INDIA -Time Travel

A view of India - In a Time Capsule.

Tum udo jahan tak udna hai... (A hindi poem)

Several years ago... or more like 12 years ago, I wrote a few lines which i still remember:

"If only i could fly,
touch the stars so high...
a dream that my eyes always see,
if only i were free to be me..."

And that thought grew into a poetry today:

"Tum udo jahan tak udna hai

Ye aakash bhi main hu
Ye pahad bhi main hu
Ye nadi bhi main hu 
Ye sansar bhi main hu

Tum udo pankhen faila ke...
Ye hawa jinpe tum ho sawaar, wo main hu
Tum jala do har andhere ko...
Tumhare aag ka aakaar bhi main hu...

Tum udo jahan tak udna hai...

Jhumo tum magan hoke...
Suro ki jhankaar bhi main hu...
Gaao is prakriti ke taraane ko...
Tumhare shabdo ka vichaar bhi main hu...

Tum udo jahan tak udna hai...

Tum failo har khusboo me...
Tum phool, tumhara daar bhi main hu...
Tum pyaar karo bharpoor...
Tumhare hone ka ahankaar bhi main hi...

Tum udo jahan tak udna hai...
Tum ho to main hu..."


Mayaank
20160527-2348

Live like a RIVER!

When I was a teenager, with an intent to glamorize things and be different -I used to fill slambook questions of my friends that my favorite teacher is 'Nature'. Then, I had many other amusing answers as well to some other questions which may be of interest to other teenagers these days - in case they still fill up slambooks - but of all the things - this answer amuses me now, more than ever.

Is it true? Is Nature really the best teacher?

Nature has vivid forms - it's destructive form often changes our lives forever. We have all heard of and sometimes experienced this as well. Earthquakes, Cyclones, even heavy rains or dust-storms have a tremendous effect on our lives. They make us realize that One Day we all Die.

"Memento mori (Latin: "remember that you must die") is the medieval Latin theory and practice of reflection on mortality, especially as a means of considering the vanity of earthly life and the transient nature of all earthly goods and pursuits. It is related to the ars moriendi ("The Art of Dying") and related literature. Memento mori has been an important part of ascetic disciplines as a means of perfecting the character by cultivating detachment and other virtues, and by turning the attention towards the immortality of the soul and the afterlife." ~ Wikipedia.

But, the one form of nature which never ceases to amuse me is a River..

Growing up not far from the banks of Hooghly River - I was always attached to Rivers.
Whenever, I was in an emotional turmoil, or  even if I just wanted to be me ... I always walked down to the banks of Hooghly - sometimes with my friends Mani and Nitesh, rarely alone as well - but  everytime I used to sit there... I lost all my words. It used to enlighten a feeling of magnanimity in me. Nothing else mattered. As if I was able to drown all my feelings -- regrets, happiness and pain in this flowing river...

But Time persists. Hooghly became a very far-fetched thing. Life changes and you cant always go the the banks of that child-hood river just to sit and contemplate.

I may have cried so many times on that river-bank, I may have just sat down and listened to the temple bells or I may have seen pyres burning on the same bank  ... but there was something which took me really very long to realize... that you don't have to be in-front of a river... You can just be one!

Now, I am not talking about the geography classes of the different stages of a snow-fed river, but life is not much different either, isn't it?

A river teaches you to be persistent. You don't need to be powerful to pave your way through mountains and rocks - just persistent..
A river teaches you to be nourishing - most ancient civilizations originated near the rivers as it was nourishing and it gave food, in the same way when we grow older, we try to use our life energy in giving nourishment and happiness to those around us.
It even flows into an ocean and teaches us the meaning of life and death.

 Zongo Falls - DRC

But those are not the reasons, why I want to Live like a river...

I want to live like a river because I can just be myself - when I am sitting on those banks...

And the last time I remember, I was sitting on the banks of Hooghly around two years ago - while holding the hands of my beloved and telling her how high-tide and low tides phenomenon works, when all I wanted to say that I was in love..
I guess, Even rivers cant make certain things simpler, but then we can always try some other form of nature - like a Rose. :-)

"When you do things from your soul, you feel a river moving in you, a joy." Rumi

Letting Go...

“Most of our troubles are due to our passionate desire for and attachment to things that we misapprehend as enduring entities.” ~Dalai Lama

"

If there’s one thing we all have in common it’s that we want to feel happy; and on the other side of that coin, we want to avoid hurting. Yet we consistently put ourselves in situations that set us up for pain.

We pin our happiness to people, circumstances, and things and hold onto them for dear life. We stress about the possibility of losing them when something seems amiss. Then we melt into grief when something changes—a lay off, a break up, a transfer.

We attach to feelings as if they define us, and ironically, not just positive ones. If you’ve wallowed in regret or disappointment for years, it can seem safe and even comforting to suffer.

In trying to hold on to what’s familiar, we limit our ability to experience joy in the present.  A moment can’t possibly radiate fully when you’re suffocating it in fear.

When you stop trying to grasp, own, and control the world around you, you give it the freedom to fulfill you without the power to destroy you. That’s why letting go is so important: letting go is letting happiness in.

                                                                   " ~http://zenhabits.net/zen-attachment/

Easier said or thought of, than done!

I clearly remember the first time I was in a desert... I was 6 or 7! It was so amusing to take the sand in my hand and then see it... while I was letting it go in the strong wind... like small grains of gold flying away in the shining sun!

Eventually, my dad had to ruin it all by scolding me that it will fly in my eyes... :-)

But, it doesn't seem so simple any more!

I figured that staying busy with other things is the best way of letting something go... but then it doesn't work always - as its' more like avoiding something rather than getting over it! Infact this way, its' more like throwing a ball on a wall - the stronger you throw it, the harder it comes back to you!

A day, a week, or a month doesn't seem enough any more, no matter how much I tell myself that eventually it would simply go away... the wind of life will blow it away just like the sand grains, no matter how beautiful or shiny they were!


             

I give in to the moments that I so much want to let go. It sometimes makes me weak ~ just the thought that I chose something which was so transient! Am full of regrets!
I wish that we always remember what we choose to remember and love what we choose to love!

But then, as I try to enlighten myself - i realize that I still carry those sands! I would never be able to let them go... and I realize that life is not just about enjoying the present, it is also about cherishing everything that has happened to you in the past, as that is a part of you!

So I smile, look out to the sky and and all i can feel is gratitude!

~ No Regrets! ~

Life amuses me!!!

My Professional life has been quite a thrilling mix....a mix of everyday events which never fail to amuse me, of-course if I care enough to give them a second thought. And while giving my life this much sought after second thought, I realized that this is not just how my so-called professional life is, this is how each and every person live their lives (or atleast most :P).

The other day, I was stuck in an issue for quite some-time (2 weeks to be precise) and by my expertise (or sheer luck... ;-) ) I was able to get it resolved. After all, you can only keep issues open for so long...., So, I was in a joyous mood to enjoy the evening... and I felt that everything, that everyone around  me was saying, sounded irritating to me. Good enough reasons popped out of everything to spoil my party mood. And, finally while I slept like an angry kid in my bed, I wondered if something bad always needs to happen after something good? Is this Life's way of keeping things balanced in our lives....?

We do always find something or someone to blame things upon, and what can be a better option than life itself to put the blame on??? Right???

However, the stark truth is that we control our lives! We can blame it's mishaps on anyone or everyone or even take the blame ourselves, but that does not change our lives. We create our everyday lives through or own idiosyncratic expertise,  but the truth still remains the same, that we control our lives and come what so ever, we can always choose to be happy, or sad....!!!

So,I am thinking of all the things that make me sad and yet again, I am making another decision, which am sure I will laugh at after a while... but I decide to forgive people that I have blamed, i decide to forgive myself too for things that I have blamed myself for...and for things that make me happy, I decide to cherish their memories for as long as they feel real for!!!  

Just as I was about to sign-off, a beautiful pigeon came flying from my open window and sat in my room. Really, am amused!!! :-)

Live on my Friends, Life is never gonna be any less amusing!!!!

Illusions

An evening over River Seine - 11th Dec 2011

Is love really just based on needs?


Did you love me because you needed a companion, becuase you needed somebody to share your ups and downs, to wipe your tears and to smile when you laugh, or just because you could not live alone?


I dont' need an answer to these questions... as they are just for you to know! 


Love is not about winning or losing, if anything, it is not even about emotions... To me its an attachment... something that connects our souls! Otherwise, why would you call me everytime I think of you? everytime!
You know - even if you dont' call me any more, I always know that you can feel it!


Why do i pray for you, in all my prayers, even though i dont' believe in God?
You know - I wouldn't' be lonely even if you are with someone else... as the YOU that i Love will always be with me!


Why do I smile when I think of you, even though I want to hate you will all my heart?
You know - I cannot hate you, becuase you taught me how to love!


I do care about the world- or atleast everyone whom I should care about, but more I try to avoid my feelings for you because of them... I loose myself!


I just want to go somewhere... where nobody knows me! Live a life where I dont even know myself!  
I could never get over you, as I will have to get over myself! 

Baawra mann...

Hope is the most beautiful and yet the most crazy thing. But remember not to confuse your dreams with your hopes. A dream is that fragment of your life which you are already living, may be in reality or may be in an augmented reality. Somewhere, somehow, Dreams are True! Hope is not!